1. |
Faces in the Window
02:01
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What do you expect to see
In a chemical reality?
You’ve rented a life from somebody unknown
and nobody knows who you may be
So your face is in the window
But what side are you on?
Other faces in the window
Perhaps already gone.
Faces in the window
What side are they on?
Lined up in the traffic
Lights no longer on.
What do you expect to see
in a chemical reality?
You’re drowning your light
on a path that’s not right
and you’ll never know who you may be
but your face is in the window.
Ooohh
What do you expect to see
In a chemical reality?
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2. |
The Silence of 4am
05:27
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The Silence of 4am
Loud enough to wake you
The elephant in the room bellows loud at this time
Taps you on the shoulder
and demands your attention
Attention that you just don’t want to give.
When you feel the grief that is eating your soul on the quiet
When you know you’re down but you tell everyone you’re alright
You can’t bury your head in the the silence of 4am.
The silence of 4am
Loud enough to wake you
That discord that can’t be ignored, but you’ll try…
When it steals your sleep every night of the week it’s not fair
When you’re on the floor but pretend you enjoy being there
When you realise it’s every decision you’ve made got you here
By day you’re achieving and happy, at night you’re in tears
No denying yourself in the silence of 4am
Well you steal my sleep many nights of the week
Is it me…or you?
The heart sees one thing but the eyes another
Such beautiful confusion.
I’m observing all this, watching and learning
Try not to drown in the angsting and burning
as I would have done before I knew what I know now
Making sense of it all in the silence of 4am.
The silence of 4am - you can hear your own voice (loud enough to wake you)
The silence of 4am - you’ll find your memory (The elephant in the room bellows loud at this time)
The silence of 4am - it’s almost the morning (Taps you on the shoulder and demands your attention)
Dry those tears from out of nowhere, look forward to day.
It’s not dark everywhere…so why linger here?
In the silence of 4am.
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3. |
Now
02:16
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Future’s not here
Yet you’ve wrapped it in fear.
The past’s disappeared
Why shed a tear? (Give a smile and live)
(See) - The blue past the grey
(Smell) - the scent of the day
(Hear) - the birds singing grace
(Touch) - the skin on his face
(Taste) - the peace in your reach
(Feel) - feel the sand on the beach
(Nothing’s wrong now) - Nothing’s wrong now
(you can walk strong) You can walk strong.
Future’s not here (make it what you want)
Yet you’ve wrapped it in fear. (let it go forgive)
The past’s disappeared (Give a smile and live)
Why shed a tear?
(See) - The blue past the grey
(Smell) - the scent of the day
(Hear) - the birds singing grace
(Touch) - the skin on his face
(Taste) - the peace in your reach
(Feel) - feel the sand on the beach
(Nothing’s wrong now) - Nothing’s wrong now
(you can walk strong) You can walk strong.
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4. |
Look Up
02:28
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Summer duvet time
Aestivation and re-navigation
Hanging in an agonisingly sweet limbo
Locked down but free as a bird
Just fairy lights and fantasies for company
and daily dances with strangers aroused by the fear porn
The breeze in the trees disagrees with what seizes us now
and Venus’ gaze seems abnormally bright somehow
Always something bigger going on
Lie under your summer duvet and look up
Just look up! Just look up!
Lie under your summer duvet and look up.
Summer duvet time
Slumbering under? Or wakefully watching the scene?
The lines between the lovers and the haters become blurred
A disconnect with what is seen and what is heard.
Fag butts in the chimnea remind that people been here
Don’t share my view? You can’t come near!
Divided up and sick with fear
The breeze in the trees disagrees with what seizes us now
Throw off your summer duvet and look up
Just look up! Just look up!
Throw off your summer duvet and look up.
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5. |
Delusions
04:16
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Signs or delusions?
Help or confusion?
Something to trust, or a test of our fears?
Is every lit pathway safe to proceed on?
Sometimes it leads to madness in here.
Speak to me straight
don’t want codes to decipher
and please don’t trust words from a snake in the grass.
Were these truly signs
or egotistical desires?
Cos we are all narcissists
as much as we’re empaths.
It took fourteen pages to clear out my head
Seven sides of words that I’d never said
Always seeing those ‘signs’ everywhere
Am I learning from you?
Do you learn from me too?
Fourteen pages to clear out my head
Twenty-five years of a pattern inbred
Now you can be you, and I can be me
If it blocks out your sun
it’s not meant to be.
Do I stay or go?
Please recite my dilemma.
Let me hear it out loud.
Are we losing ourselves in the woods forever
Because we are too proud?
Same songs sung but different meanings behind
Constantly misinterpreting signs
Unfinished business abound.
Oh what a beautiful position to be in…
your second choice,
quietly on hold in the background.
It took fourteen pages to clear out my head
Seven sides of words that I’d never said
Always seeing those signs everywhere
Do you see them too?
Too good to be true?
Fourteen pages to clear out my head
Twenty-five years of a pattern inbred
Now you can be you, and I can be me
Just another scene
in my living movie.
Signs or delusions? (Signs or delusions)
Help or confusion? (Help or confusion)
Minds want to see
but our hearts cannot hear.
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6. |
Empty Vessel
05:02
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So your life has been been thrown in the air once again
You're having to be your own best friend
and embrace this empty space as a brand new start.
You can pack everything that you own in an hour
You've chosen to live in life's solitary tower
but you don't feel freedom - you feel like you're falling apart.
It's an hourly exchange between hope and despair
Both take you away from the here, they're both over there.
You never envisaged living this way
You're needed by nobody night-time or day
with freedom to do as you please whenever you like.
Got nothing of permanence tying you here
Just one little toe on this planet you fear
Have you done it all totally wrong?
Or is it alright...
Cos every day you get just what you need
That little toe touching the earth will soon be full feet
It's just life beginning again
It's nowhere near the end
Just some turbulence as all your plans fall to the ground
Sometimes we need times like these to turn things around.
Does this blank canvas make you a cold empty vessel?
A concept with which you have constantly wrestled
Yet being in this place in your life you've so much to give.
You've got time, you've got space, you're in no kind of race
and in spite of the pain etched all over your face
in the comfort of your broken heart many would love to live.
It's a very fine line between hope and despair
It takes so much effort to shine when you struggle for air
Yet what you bring is needed here
the impact you're making will one day be clear
Just wait and see where those cards land on the ground
but please don't imagine a world where you're not around.
You can dismantle all that you own in an hour
but the steps that you've taken reflect your true power
Let go of all outcomes, expectations sour
You've planted your seeds...now wait 'til they flower.
You're worried that people will think you're a fool
Not followed convention, walked off from it all
but your door's always open, you knocked down your wall
This cold empty vessel's in fact very full.
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Karen McCabe Windsor, UK
Singer-pianist from Windsor, UK.
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